Open Letter to Governor Pritzker

 September 9, 2025

Governor J.B. Pritzker

401 South Spring Street

Springfield, Illinois 62704

 

Dear Governor Pritzker,

I am writing to express my deep appreciation for your leadership. In these turbulent times, your governance has made Illinois feel like a bastion of reason and principle, and for that, I am sincerely grateful.

Looking ahead, one can't help but consider the possibility of renewed federal overreach, including threats to send federal agents or the National Guard to Chicago. While the natural response is one of opposition, I wonder if a more powerful strategy might be one of radical, satirical hospitality.

Should troops be sent to our streets, I propose we don't resist them, but rather welcome them with open arms—and a to-do list. Imagine issuing a press release celebrating this influx of federally-funded manpower for our new "Civic Beautification Initiative." We could assign them to our most pressing needs: cleaning the lakefront, tending to our parks, and ensuring our city gutters are spotless. We can publicly praise their service, highlight the welcome economic boost from their local spending, and, of course, meticulously invoice the federal government for all logistical and security costs incurred during their "service visit."

Similarly, should there be a surge of ICE agents, we could counter the intended atmosphere of fear with an overwhelming display of solidarity. Instead of hiding, we could launch city-wide festivals on the waterfront celebrating the immense cultural and economic contributions of our immigrant communities. We could organize "Know Your Rights" workshops right next to folk music concerts and food fairs. For every agent of intimidation, we would respond with a thousand acts of welcome, transforming a hostile act into a powerful, public celebration of the very people being targeted.

This approach—using proactive grace and biting satire as a form of resistance—re-frames the narrative. It demonstrates that Illinois will not be bullied, but will instead meet hostility with creativity, principle, and an unshakable commitment to its values.

Thank you again for your steadfast leadership. Please continue to keep Illinois an oasis of sanity.

Respectfully,