Why read this? I ran across Crocker's name from the Ken Burns documentary on Vietnam. She struck me as an articulate, intelligent mother trying to understand and explain the tragedy of her son's death in Vietnam. I looked her up and discovered this memoir and decided to read it. It's available online at https://tile.loc.gov/storage-services/service/vhp/0111/011174/pd0001.pdf
In it, readers are drawn into the inner spaces of a mid-century American family, struggling with the terrible implications of global strife. The tale serves as both a thorough biography of her eldest son, Denton “Mogie” Crocker Jr., and a melancholy meditation on the idealism and tragedy that dominated the Vietnam era. Crocker’s prose is dignified and calm, her memory relentless; together they make what could have been a straightforward history into a raw study of love and sorrow.
It opens by describing the context of post-war America, a time of seemingly great wealth, but yet one fraught with the existential fears of the Cold War. Mogie (b. 1947) is described as a child of exceptional intelligence and sensitive nature. Born in Saratoga Springs, New York, he grew up with a fascination for the heroic stories of the past, especially the Civil War, and was well aware of the tensions gathering in his own day. Mogie is portrayed by Crocker as a young guy who felt a deep, almost religious sense of his duty to the country, a conviction that often ran counter to the usual light-hearted attitude of the youth of the 1960s. That friction between the young man’s inner tenderness and his imagined martial commitment is the tragic heart of the book’s early chapters. He was a grade skipping, honors student of a boy, but he thought his actual vocation was to stand up for the principles he read about in his history books.
Things come to a head when Mogie, still a teen, wants to join the Army. Mogie’s parents were reluctant to start with and he had clear academic potential, but he felt talk was cheap and he needed to stand up for his ideas. He ran away from home but left a letter expressing his concern for the Vietnamese and the domino theory. Eventually he got his parents to sign the papers and joined up on his seventeenth birthday in June 1964. Crocker writes on the odd experience of watching her son become a soldier. His letters from basic training and airborne school at Fort Campbell are the writings of a youngster trying to become a man, documenting the difficulties of military life with a mix of pride and fatigue. He wrote home about the rigors of jump school and the discipline expected of a paratrooper, displaying a new maturity that both amazed and worried his mother. Mogie’s idealism began to collide with the hard realities of counter-insurgency warfare when he was deployed to Vietnam as part of the 101st Airborne Division, the Screaming Eagles.
Using Mogie’s own letters, the narrative presents two points of view: the mother’s nervous waiting at home, and her son’s growing fatigue in his letters from the field. Mogie’s depictions of the heat, the leeches and the faceless adversary give a harsh, no-holds-barred perspective at the ground combat in 1965 and 1966. He was often disappointed by the nature of the fight, the difficulties in recognizing the enemy and the seeming apathy of some of the people they were assigned to protect. But even in the forest he was a scholar at heart, and he asked his mother to send him copies of books and magazines so he might hold on to the intellectual life he had left behind. He requested everything from classic books to current affairs journals, revealing an intellect that would not be confined by the trappings of war.
The emotional climax of the narrative comes in the spring of 1966. Mogie had seen his share of fighting, and had survived the grueling months of his first tour. But the severity of the fight was mounting. His intelligence and education had given him options to pursue safer assignments but he always stayed with his group in the field. Mogie was killed in battle on his nineteenth birthday, June 4, 1966, during a search-and-destroy mission in Kontum Province. Crocker’s account of hearing the news, the green vehicle and the two military men arriving at their home, is devastatingly clear and takes away all romanticism about war.
The rest of the narrative chronicles the long, agonizing aftermath, including the repatriation of his body and the funeral in Saratoga Springs, and the family’s struggle to make sense of a loss that seemed both inevitable and incomprehensible. Crocker writes of how loss was in every moment, from the silence at the dinner table to the painful chore of going through Mogie’s stuff. She also considers the greater social background of the day, as the nation became more and more divided over the very war that had taken her son. It is a memoir not merely of death, but of a mother's enduring love and the ability of memory to bridge the gap between the living and the dead.
Son of the Cold War is an outstanding accomplishment in the memoir genre. Jean-Marie Crocker does what many historians do not: she rescues an individual life from the cold statistics of a muddy war. She writes with a commendable discipline; she never succumbs to sentimentality, but trusts to the strength of primary materials and her own acute observations to give the measure of her anguish. The book’s greatest asset is its honesty. Crocker does not shy away from the complexity of Mogie’s character, his stubbornness, his occasional arrogance and his deep-seated insecurities. By making him a real human being, not a polished image, she has made his death feel like a personal loss to the reader.
In addition, the memoir is a strong denunciation of the Cold War state of mind that required such sacrifices of its young people. Never overtly political, the contrast of Mogie’s youthful dreams with the tragic reality of his death speaks eloquently about the distance between geopolitical policy and the families that pay for it. The memoir asks readers to reflect on the human cost of decisions on foreign policy and the permanent scars they leave on the domestic front. In short, Jean-Marie Crocker has given her son a legacy as permanent as any monument. Son of the Cold War is a must read for anybody interested in the human aspects of the Vietnam War.” It is a story of a youngster who aspired to be a hero and a mother who refused to let the world forget who the boy really was. As she puts it, Mogie Crocker is no longer a name on a wall, but a genuine, breathing presence whose narrative continues to echo decades after his last mission.
As she writes in her preface:
Time and scholarship are revealing misconceptions and errors that can only altar the future. As we continue to ponder the sacrifice of young men like our son, measured against the confessed flaws and misjudgments of our leaders, we may better understand the conflicts of reason and emotion that continue to surround Vietnam.
Mogie was born June 4, 1947. My birthday was June 3, 1947. His parents wouldn't permit him to have a toy gun; neither would mine. Both sets of parents were academics. What explained the difference in his reaction to the conventional wisdom and governmental "brainwashing" and my skepticism? Was it my Quaker schooling? I opted for conscientious objection; he felt obligated to join the army. Why the difference?
His mother died in 2020 aged 97.