A recent article in the New York Times Magazine raised some interesting issues in my mind regarding the increasingly widespread practice of using sperm donors to have children in the case of infertile husbands or same-sex couples. The author knew from childhood he was the result of a sperm donation and so decided to seek out his half-siblings. He found 32 of them. His parents, one of whom was an ObGyn, in their desire to raise a child, had not considered the implications of what is really a huge social experiment.

In one instance he discovered that a long-time friend he had shared many experiences with, was, in fact, his half-brother. His sister, conceived using a different sperm donor, was in reality his half-sister. The result of his interest in finding more relatives resulted in the photo-essay in the Times Magazine. It’s striking how similar they all look.

As the parent of six adopted children, I’ve never been particularly interested in, nor worried about, the supposed blood ties between parents and children. In fact, I was amused by the effect our adoptions had on the family’s genealogical chart; it’s royally screwed up. The prospect of having possibly hundreds of half-siblings out there from sperm donation, however, should give each of us pause as to the implications. (With DNA, the possibility of unknown siblings becomes increasingly probable as one of our adopted sons recently discovered.)

I suspect most sperm donations are conducted in a relatively concentrated geographic area. Even in an area the size of Los Angeles, the likelihood of a half-brother/sister running into each other and perhaps developing a relationship in ignorance of their true relationship is statistically quite probable.

And what of the relationship between the sperm donor father and all of his children. Should a limit
Be placed on the number of sperm donations? Does the biological father have any responsibility toward his children -- they are, after all, just as much his biological children as those who might have been conceived the old-fashioned way. Does biology determine parenthood. As an adoptive parent I would say not; I’m sure others would disagree. The interest in DNA geneology and relationships will only exacerbate the issues. What if a donor father has no interest in meeting his offspring? And what if the donor is a hereditary disease carrier?

The law as it stands today varies by state.

Susan Crockin, an adjunct professor at Georgetown Law and a co-author of Legal Conceptions: The Evolving Law and Policy of Assisted Reproductive Technologies, says, a majority of states have only baseline provisions to govern sperm-donation practices. Most adhere to the Uniform Parentage Act, which establishes that when a man donates sperm to a consenting married couple, the donor is not a parent; paternity rights belong to the husband of the impregnated woman. (In the states that haven’t adopted the same law in full, a sperm donor could theoretically claim to have paternity rights to a child, or be ordered to pay child support.) In 2017, in light of the legalization of same-sex marriage, two of the states that have adopted the Uniform Parentage Act enacted an update making the spouse of the sperm recipient, regardless of gender, a legal co-parent as long as they consent to the procedure.** Note that Crockin’s book was published almost ten years ago, but it seems the legal situation has evolved little since then. For a more recent examination of the legal consequences see https://www.legalmatch.com/law-library/article/sperm-donor-parental-rightsobligations.html. For example, in Pennsylvania, DNA linkage trumps any other kind of parentage.

The American Society of Reproductive Medicine has recommended limited the number of donations in a population area of 800,000 to 25 but note this is just a recommendation.

Some videos of donors with their children:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5rJWVYPCaYc

**https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2018/07/sperm-donations-emotional-consequences/564587/

https://www.nytimes.com/2019/06/26/magazine/sperm-donor-questions.html?action=click&contentCollection=Magazine®ion=Footer&module=WhatsNext&version=WhatsNext&contentID=WhatsNext&moduleDetail=undefined&pgtype=Multimedia